The Inner Game

Achieving Relaxed Concentration

The year is 2016, my football team have made it to the semi finals of the league cup. The opposing team is one of the best in the league but all the boys are up for it. Last game we fought hard, stealing the win in extra time after a great goal by our centre mid.

It’s a sunny day but the temperature is mild, the perfect conditions for me as I get hot really quick. As the first half kicks of i’m bursting with excitement and nerves.

The initial 10 minutes of any game is an adjustment period. Whichever team builds momentum usually carries it for the first quarter. As the ball gets played to me on the left side, I have a man hot on my tail. I try to play the ball into the middle but it’s blocked. This rattles my confidence from the off. The pressure starts to build and the chatter in my head begins to get louder “You can’t make mistakes like that in a game like this”.

The next 2-3 opportunities I get don’t go well, unable to take on my man and passes of the mark. My critic becoming louder still, more judgemental and with it, my performance seems to be declining.

The opposition is on the attack, a through ball has been played to their winger and we are in a foot race to reach it. Their man gets their first but I’m determined to not let him through on goal. All chatter is gone and my entire focus is on the ball. He takes one or two touches edging closer to our keepers box before I slide in and retrieve the ball.

From then on, the conversation in my head ceases and I’m back playing the game of football and not the game inside my head. We went on to win that game 5-4, a battle until the final whistle. My memory of the rest of the game is hazy. So focused on playing, the heaviness of my chest, surrounding players and the ball itself.

The more focused I was on the present moment the better my performance became and the less internal dialogue occured.

The Inner Game

In the book “The inner Game of tennis” by W. Timothy Gallwey. He describes this phenomena as having 2 Selves.

• Self 1 is the teller. The ego who wishes to be involved at every moment and believes it knows what’s best. It is the constant commentary in our heads, attaching to moments through judgements of “bad” or “good”, “should” or “shouldn’t”

• Self 2 is the doer. It holds our natural ability to perform at peak potential. Not interrupted by judgement or distracted by past or future. Learning through observation and action.

The core message: The secret to winning any game is through effortless action - relaxed concentration.

Self 1 takes the reins as it does not trust Self 2. Criticising, controlling and begetting Self 2 in an attempt to better performance. The more Self 1 tries to take control the worse performance is. More attention is being put towards judgmental analysis and pulled away from the task at hand. Removing awareness and presence.

Why does judgement prevent flow?

You can’t Praise positive actions without demonising negative ones. They are relative to one another. Self judgement becomes a self fulfilling prophecy. What is praised tends to become worse and what is berated tends to remain “bad”.

Letting go of judgement is not ignoring what is but simply not attatching to it. Attachment is what prevents flow. Attention is removed from the action itself and placed onto what is “wrong” about the given moment.

When a child is young, it has not learned this constant chatter from Self 1. As it tries to walk it falls over, time and time again. The child does not judge itself for not being able to walk. It picks itself back up, observing what went from and living completely in the moment. Until, eventually it discovers how to walk. This is the natural learning process.

3 keys to activating flow:

In order to activate flow, Gallwey states 3 components must be present.

• Having a clear image of the result you’d like to achieve makes the result achievable.

• Let go of judgement of what is.

• Let it happen - arguably the most difficult step. The best way I’ve found to let things flow is to focus your attention onto the breath. Being aware of how each inhale feels as it comes into the body, expanding the chest and stomach and its release.

The awareness of what is creates feedback, allowing you to feel out the process without Self 1 taking over.

Practice letting go.

To still the mind it must be put somewhere, into the present moment. Keeping the mind in the here and now creates focus. So absorbed in what is happening it forgets to try too hard or take control. Become aware of your body, surroundings or breath.

Practice is the only way to learn the ability of presence. Presence is always there, it is us who leave it.

The greatest lapses in concentration come when we allow our minds to project what is about to happen or to dwell on what has already happened.

One way to sooth the mind when it begins to worry about the future is too play out the worry:

What’s the worst that could happen?

And then what?

And then what?

Typically the worry either fades or come to the conclusion of outcast and death, which in most cases is very unlikely. By playing the scenario out to the conclusion we see how irrational the fear actually is. Give it a try.

It is difficult to be joyful or in flow when the ego believes it is in a life or death situation.

Habit change:

Each behaviour serves a need, condemning this behaviour does not promote a better means to the end. It is difficult to be aware of the function of the behaviour whilst simultaneously berating it.

Instead of fighting old habits, create new ones which fill the need and replace the old. During the process of replacing, detach from the outcome and focus solely on the process.

When creating new habits that fill the same need, the initial stages will not be perfect. This can create negative judgement from Self 1. Causing us to “try harder”, Self 1 takes over and we step out of flow.

Think of a time you tried harder at something only to find you got worse at the thing. In my earlier case, my performance in football suffered.

Things change as and when they are ready to, the process flows naturally.

The Essence of competition: 

We live in an achievement-oriented society, in which, people are measured by their competence across varying areas. From birth we are praised or ignored for how well we done something. From grades in school too tidying our room. One core message, sown into everything:

You are a good person based on your abilities to do things successfully.

In the process of learning to measure our value on achievement, the measureless value of human beings is ignored.

We are what we are, not how well we performed on a given moment.

The essence of competition has been lost to achievements relative to others.

Competition is not about beating others but about testing one’s ability to overcome challenge. It is a competition within to extract our potential.

The surfer waits for the big wave because he values the challenge - draws out true potential. The greater the obstacle, the bigger the opportunity to stretch capabilities.

The best version of you appears when you learn to let go of judgement, become immersed in the moment and let life happen.

Stay Curious,

Morgan Bedford